Laura Stamps Fiction

INTERVIEW WITH THE WINNING DOG AT THE NATIONAL BREEDERS COMPETITION  “My name is Waffles. I’m a Labra-doodle,  Doodle-poo, Poodle-loodle,  Labra-loo, Dipsy-noodle,  Waffle-doodle-doo.  And I’ll do anything  for treats. Obviously.” (First published in “Bear Creek Haiku”)

THIS IS HOW YOU CHOOSE A GOOD MAN Paul says, “I can’t believe  you brought your dog  on our first date.” Buster looks at him  and growls.  “Date over,” I say. And leave. (First published in “Bear Creek Haiku”)

AFTER THE DIVORCE  Google search: “Why  does my new puppy  cry every night?” Answer: “Because  it’s lonely.” Oh.  Okay. Tonight  we can cry together.  (First published in “The Alien Buddha’s Microdoses”)

CONVERSATION WITH MY DOG  Me: “I can’t believe you chewed up all my clothes! What  were you thinking?!” Dog: “Fashion  Police to the rescue?” (First published in “The Alien Buddha’s Microdoses”)

SATURDAY ADOPTION EVENT AT THE LOCAL SHELTER  Poor little Toby. An abandoned  Chihuahua. Eight years old. Just  another senior. Unwanted. “He’s  mine,” I say. And now he is. (First published in “The Alien Buddha’s Microdoses.”)